Okay, so we went out of town and had a nice time, but you're probably wondering about the title of this post, right? I'm getting there...
While sleeping soundly in our cabin Friday night, I had the most vivid dream that we had our 2 Ethiopian babies home...except the little loves were girls, not boys like we've requested. Despite the obvious gender difference, which didn't seem to phase me in dreamland, my interactions with them were as real as me typing these words.
It was beautiful. It felt completely right (again, with the exception of these little babes being girls instead of boys). It felt like love.
Their faces were, and still are, crystal clear to me. They were both breath-takingly gorgeous, one with lighter skin and a teeny, tiny, petite nose, the other with a darker complexion and huge, dark, dancing eyes. They appeared to be about 1 year old and 3 years old, but (unfortunately) were nameless in my dream.
Bits of the dream are blurry, but I can clearly remember a portion when I was giving them both a bath. These two beautiful babies were playing together in a bathtub and I (their momma) was laughing with them as I washed their sweet little fingers and toes. While bathing them, I realized they each were covered in sand, so I washed water over them multiple times until their perfect brown skin was smooth once more.
My entire dream sequence may have been longer, but my mind can only vividly recall this particular part. Although a small scene, it was enough to bring joy to my morning when I remembered it. I have no idea if any, or all, of it is/was prophetic in any way, or if the sand was symbolic for anything, but I'm thankful for the thought that my babies are in my mind even when my body is asleep.
After waking and remembering my dream, I couldn't fall back asleep, so I let my handsome hubby sleep in while I went downstairs to curl up with a book beside the fireplace. I've been reading Kisses from Katie and was (sadly) nearing the end. What a book! It's an autobiography by Katie Davis, an amazing young woman who gave up her comfortable life in America to follow God's call to move to Uganda to serve "the least of these" and is in the process of adopting thirteen (yes, I said 13!!) Ugandan girls. She has an INCREDIBLE story of what following God at all costs actually looks like, and challenges me constantly through her writing. I'd strongly encourage you to put this book at the top of your "2012 Must-Read" list! Anyway, back to my story (although Katie's is usually much more interesting!): I settled down by the warmth of the fire, my blanket wrapped around me, with only a few chapters left in my book. Chapter 18 was where my reading was to begin...and it was about Katie bathing her youngest daughter Grace...I couldn't believe I had just woken up from a dream about bathing my babies to pick up a book to begin reading about another woman bathing her child. But her bathtub story wasn't just a story reminiscing about a cute time in the tub, instead it was about her nightly battle to get Grace into the tub. Night after night, it's a struggle that goes from bad to worse right up until she's put in the bathtub against her will...then once in the water she realizes she likes the bath! Night after Night.
"The bath time struggle never is about the bath at all. It is about obedience. Grace is three years old and she simply does not want to obey. She thinks she should be the one to decide whether she gets in the tub or not. She is three years old, and she is trying to figure out just how much control she has in her little life. At this point, not much." (page 226)
She then goes on to describe her life, and her own resistance to God and his daily calling for her life, being very similar to the bathtub episodes. He calls (her) us to do things that just don't always add up to what we want to do.
We question him.
I love her words for (her) our reaction when we finally submit to his will:
"So God picks me up, exhausted from struggling, and plops me in the center of His will for my life. And then a funny thing happens. As I kick and scream and struggle, I remember: I like being in the center of God's will for my life. God's plan is usually pretty great. It is a whole lot better than mine anyway. I am so glad that He does not allow me to win.
The more I strive to live in the center of God's will, the more He asks me to give up, the more uncomfortable I become. He teaches me, over and over again, that He does know best. The "bathtub," the uncomfortable places, they get only more difficult. But I am learning to remember, before I even get there, that eventually this will be what is best for me, and more important, what is best for His Glory." (page 227)
Was my dream related to this chapter? I have no idea, but I feel like God is using the connection to teach me something. I may not know what it is now, and I may not see it until years from now, but I have a feeling that one day I'll have an "Aha" moment as I recall the weekend I was pondering the connection between babies and bathtubs.
I'd love to hear your thoughts...